The "Meetcha" Trip, Days with Elliora

Days with Elliora-

Some of my first day with Elli is described in "Meetcha" Trip Post 1, but here are more details:

Even though I was supposed to see Elli for two hours in the morning and then two hours in the afternoon, she had a doctor appointment that couldn't be changed. She was getting the plaster off her leg from a tendon surgery.

So, I visited with Zephan that extra time. Then we drove 2 1/2 hours to where Elli lives. I wished I could have seen more of that area of the Country, but there wasn't time. These visits are truly for adoption, not a tourist thing.

I still was able to see Elli the day I was supposed to, only in the evening instead. The sweet girl had been in a car traveling to the doctor and back for five hours total and still retained a darling disposition.

I was pleased to meet both the foster grandparents. And also again, happy that she had foster grandparents, not "parents", since just like Zephan, there is a place for a Daddy and a Mommy.

Elli was pleasant and talkative, she never concerned over my not being able to "talk". She played with a "tablet" that played music when buttons are pushed. I jiggled her on my knees to the beat of the music and Elli laughed that deep belly laugh that babies do when something is funny to them. Just the way Zephan laughed at being dragged on the floor, Elli laughs when being bounced. I also learned later, that I get the same delightful laugh when giving her kisses.

Second day:

The second day, we met at the "center" again like the night before. This Center has much to do. It is more like a therapy room, or a sensory room. We weren't there long on day two, really. Soon we went to get Elli's visa photo. Then we went out to eat. Elli eats well. She had "meatball". And by the way, "meatball" must be mistranslated, it is not a ball, it is flat. It is spiced deliciously, but certainly not a ball. It should be called something else.

It was at this lunch that I learned how much kisses got those belly laughs out of Elli.

Lunch was with Elli, her foster grandparents, my facilitator, and Abbie. After lunch I was told that I could take Elli to our hotel room and play with her. I would have her for four hours. The foster grandparents went home. My facilitator stayed for awhile, she helped settle us in, and translate Elli's words, then she went on her way. 

I was able to Skype John and the children at home, with Elli on my lap! That was pretty special. It was good for them to see her. I had been sending photos and emails, but this was really a surprise! Elli liked seeing the family, but soon became fixated on the "boootuns". She constantly wanted to push buttons of the keyboard, the camera, the phone. She is all out crazy for electronic buttons. She continually said phrases I did not understand, but always ended with "boooootuns". She said these phrases as if she were going to "just become flush and die" if she couldn't push the "boootuns". It was really cute, really silly, and sometimes over the top too much!

I had wished  that I had a stroller and was able to go for a walk, instead of being inside. Elli can not walk and weighs too much for me to carry her much. So we were stuck, but we must make the best of it. Abbie had refrained herself from "squishing" (squishing means deep cuddly, loving hugs) Elli for a long while. She wanted to not interfere with our bonding, but then did ask to "squish her" and so she did! Abbie was wonderful to have with me. I enjoyed her fellowship and getting to know her more. And I'm so grateful for all the photos that she took. I wouldn't have been able to get so many with two camera crazed children.

After a while, Elli became very discontent, very "busy". She wanted only buttons and to wash her hands and to wash my hands over and over and she was getting whiny. She has missed her nap, was tired, and I didn't know what else to do. Abbie and I began to put her coat and boots on to get our facilitator for help. We had put Elliora on the bed to get her boots on and Elli began blinking very slowly and put her thumb in her mouth and was looking sleepy.

Yes! another thumb sucker. God is good to me.

Elli studied Abbie's face for awhile, sucking her thumb soothingly. Then she turned over and switched thumbs and studied my face. It was the most precious thing. She studied my face the way a newborn baby studies their Mommy's face as they nurse. Here little Elli was looking at me the same way, while sucking her thumb. She was soothed and she was imprinting me into her memory, into her thoughts. She did this for about half an hour. Again, with this child, God gave us something that I thought I had missed years ago. Elli is 5. And she longs for a mother to bond with. She still retains sweet, ready to be nurtured, baby behaviors, needs that have never been fully met. She is ready for bonding, she is ready for a family.

Elli's foster grandparents came while she was still sleeping and we chatted just a bit about Elli's day and then they took her home. Elli woke up very pleasant. It is evident her foster family loves her. And I am so grateful for this.

Third day:

The third day was rather short. We had just two hours. We had to drive back afterward, so that I could fly back home early the next morning.

This day was so "free" with Elli. I just felt like she was mine. She was excited to see me and I picked her right up into my arms. She was delightful and had a plan of what we would do. I forgot to mention previously in writing, that Elli is quite confident and rather bossy, in a charming way. She tells me

to take her over to the ball pit,

to sit in the ball pit,

to throw the balls,

to sit like she is sitting,

to sit right beside her,

to put my legs like hers,

and so on and so on.

It is all done in a sweet way, though it sounds demanding. What she is after is not to really "boss others around", but she wants to experience everything with me. She wants to be very close. She doesn't want me to go away from her. She wants every part of our day to be together, very close together.

She looked very carefully through the photo book of our family. She wanted to know who everyone was. She was given this book on our second day, and was looking through it again on this third day.

The social workers all (there may have been 6) looked at the photos and all wanted to know what her new name would be. They were so pleasant and interested in everything.

Her foster grandmother was once again looking through the photo book and she became emotional.

Our facilitator let her know that I will give letters and photos often.

I traced Elli's feet and hands and she found fun in that!

Elli was told that I had to go and that there will be a long wait and I will come back and be her mommy! Elli took things much better than Zephan did. I do not think Elli understands just how long the wait is, though. She sounded upbeat, she believes I will be back, and she only asked if she could go out to the car along with me. I gave her lots of kisses. I asked to tell the foster grandma that I know she loves Elli and thank you! Foster Baba and I, hugged and kissed cheeks. I made another friend, though we can not speak each other's language, we both feel a deep love for a particular little girl. It was pretty emotional.

Crystal